feeling it

I'm not feeling that close to God at the moment. As I sit here in the flat He has blessed me with, looking at the view that He wanted me to see every day, watching the birds soar around in the wind while I'm tucked all cosy with my included heating on I cannot help but to feel grateful for the blessings He has given me. The fact that He has given me so much, physically, financially, relationally and yet how can I still feel so far away. I listen to my worship albums (still loving Newday 09) and sing in the band at church and while I'm doing that I mean it. I mean it. It's when I step out of that bubble and into everyday life I seem to lose perspective of my Father.

I have thought about going the other way and leaving it all behind but that would just be silly! I can't imagine my life without God being in control, or when I let Him... Turning my back on Him would be the biggest mistake of my life.

So I'm going to push on. I actually opened my bible this afternoon and read Psalm 40. God must have guided my flicking through as it really spoke to me where I'm at right now. I love it when He does that.

Now I need the motivation to continue... we'll see how this week goes. I hope I can push on.